Internet Dating is HELL 9

Part Time Love


Oh men on Part Time Love, un-tuck your T-shirts, get out of that velour armchair that makes you look like you’re in a rest home, this isn’t an ad for DFS or riser-recliners: this is dating, this is physical relationships not physiotherapy. That profile pic makes you look like you went missing on a bus trip to the chemist and your daughter’s put up posters and, if you’re standing up, I can SEE you’re breathing in. And please, don’t advertise the floral home furnishings if your ex-wife chose them in 1982. And Dan, 69 in Chelmsford? Stop ‘winking’ at me, there was a good reason I ignored your chat-up lines of, ‘Hi hunny,’ and ‘Sexy fun.’

Part time love – the dating site for, ‘Independent minds. A site for people who enjoy relations but love to live thier [sic] lives as well.’ Keeping it in the family, eh?

A site for,‘ Meaningful romance without everyday commitment.’ Christ, I’m angry. If these 60 year olds, age debatable, have another life I’m a monkey’s uncle. 

I am so not a snob but honestly, this dating lark is a joke for older women. My stomach churns when I’m ‘winked’ at or become a ‘favourite’ of a pot-bellied guy with a COJ who seriously looks old enough to be my father. I feel physically sick, I feel sexually abused. I’m not young, I’m not even middle-aged, I’ve got tons of wrinkles and at the moment, I have difficulty putting on my socks but flipping heck, virtual life gets me admiring glances from fit blokes so why not digital?

I despair, I really do, #sulksbigtime

Disclaimer: my daughter used my Guardian Soulmates account to look at guys her age, so now loads of 22-30 year olds think I’ve been drooling over their profile. Same effect on them I suppose.





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