Category Archives: Cancer

Things I’ve Learnt – Breast Cancer Part 14

With Sarah Maxwell, personal trainer and the woman who gave me back my body. Thanks to Finca Buenvino for the location. Photo: Georgia Read-Cutting   In no particular order… 1. Don’t put your Aloe Vera in the ‘fridge unless you’re … Continue reading

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Radio 2 – Breast Cancer Part 13

I’ve hit the wall – 10 days into radiotherapy, five more to go and suddenly, sitting still seems such a good idea. Gazing at my laptop screen, planning what I would do if I could be arsed. Listening to Snatam … Continue reading

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Radio Routine – Breast Cancer Part 12

    Simon Patterson, ‘Cosmic Wallpaper’ My brain runs riot, my eyes jiggle and jump. My dreams are escape plans to nowhere; reconsidered, reconstituted  relationships; obstacle races through unfathomable mazes.  My heart pounds, my head aches. I’m coming off Citalopram. … Continue reading

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Showing-Off – Breast Cancer Part 11

Before with biopsy bruise and after, or at least up ’till now. Jackie Collins has died, after ‘secretly battling with breast cancer.’ Why ‘battling’? Why ‘secretly’? The terminology of cancer diagnosis, prognosis and treatment infuriates me. Of course, I respect … Continue reading

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Monsters – Breast Cancer Part 10

Print by Jan Irvine ‘Can I book you in for radiotherapy ?’ ‘But I haven’t had my results yet, it’s on Friday?’ ‘Oh, it’s just routine, just in case.’ Wham. I feel fine, I LOOK fine but who knows what’s … Continue reading

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Marked – Breast Cancer Part 9

Cancer is boring, it’s like the neighbour who pops in and eats all the biscuits and then asks if you’ve got any cake? It charges in and takes over. You need a secretary when you’ve got cancer, ‘She’s not in, … Continue reading

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I’m Scared – Breast Cancer Part 8

I’m scared. My kids are scared. What if I wake up on the evening of the 30th of July and they’ve sliced both my tits off? I’ve signed a form, they might. I’m sorry, this is not the time for … Continue reading

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I Don’t Believe In Fairies – Breast Cancer Part 7

Photo: Monika Evans I don’t believe in fairies or the healing power of crystals but I bought one with three points when I was trying to conceive my third child, I don’t believe in astrology but I religiously read my … Continue reading

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Cancer is Caused by Anger – Breast Cancer Part 5

Twice in the last week I have been told by friends that cancer is caused by anger, i.e it’s my fault. Sod genetics and smoking, it’s the hissy fits that have brought me down. I am angry that I’ve got … Continue reading

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Life Blood-Breast Cancer Part 4

    A testimonial I received recently, unrequested, about my work… ‘I want to thank you Elaine, you have been a real inspiration to me. Apart from being genuinely fun(and tasty!),  your sessions have given me what quite a lot … Continue reading

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